Pancake mans

Sometimes at the end of a taxing work week, when I haven't had much time to play with the kids, I ask them what special thing we could do together during the weekend. Their answer, often enough, is MAKE PANCAKE MANS! So that's what we do.

Dentist

The kids had their second dentist appointment last weekend. Ivan has no cavities, and Annie didn't have any more, probably because her teeth are now covered in cavity-proof fillings (the last visit uncovered eight or nine "sugarbugs," as they call them). I'm very happy about that, because having Annie's cavities filled last time was emotionally draining for both of us.

We take the kids to a pediatric dentist, which is perhaps the best invention since the toothbrush. The kids *almost* like going there. Here they are getting their x-rays, which was a breeze for Annie and only mildly traumatizing for Ivan, who is very sensitive about his mouth.





There are TV screens on the ceilings above the chairs. Earth to Annie, come in, Annie . . . .



Ivan watched Cars during his cleaning, which almost made it bearable. He especially hates the fluoride.



At the end the kids got balloons and toys from the treasure chest. Ivan picked a car and Annie picked a magic wand, just like last time. Now we have another six months before doing it all over again.

More wedding

My favorite part of the wedding:

Ivan and Annie's favorite part of the wedding:

Parenting blunder

Me: Annie, come read this book with Ivan and me. It's bedtime.
Annie (playing with toy): No.
Me: Annie, right now. It's story time or you can go straight to bed.
Annie (playing with toy): NO.
Me: Annie, you do not say "No" to Mommy.
Annie (playing with toy): . . . .
Me: Annie, LOOK AT ME. You do NOT say no to Mommy. Did you hear me?
Annie: YES!
Me: Good. What did I say? Do you say no to mommy?
Annie (confused look): . . . .
Me: Do you say "No" to Mommy?
Annie: . . . No?

Translations

I'm finding that the kids' mispronunciations and idiosyncrasies are slowly evolving into a weird family language. For examples:

Poisonberry jam (boysenberry jam) (this is Annie's, but sometimes she just says, "Mommy, can I have Poison on my peanut butter sandwich?")
Opah Meal (oat meal)
Yummy Bears (gummy vitamins)
Red Mustard (ketchup) (this is Ivan's, he always asks for mustard when he wants ketchup, so we have to clarify whether he wants "yellow mustard" or "red mustard")

Bedtime stories

Ivan's been a bit wound up at bedtime lately. We usually have to threaten him with "consequences" before he'll settle down and go to sleep, but in the process it's hard not to be defeated by his charms. Like tonight:

Ivan: Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY!
Me: Ivan, you are supposed to be SLEEPING.
Ivan: But I want to tell you something!
Me: Ivan, if you can't be quiet and try to go to sleep-
Ivan: My jacket has ROCKS IN IT!
Me: Then I am going to have to take away--what do you mean?
Ivan: At school I found out that my jacket has pockets and I put rocks in them!
Me: Ok, but you need to go to sleep. You know the rule, you have to be quiet--
Ivan: Except one is not a rock!
Me: And let your body rest--wait, what is it then?
Ivan: It is a TONE.
Me: A stone?
Ivan: For TONE SOUP. And other kinds of soups with tones. Tomorrow at dinnertime, can we make Tone Soup again? It's been a super long time since we had that kind of soup.
Me: Yes, Ivan, we will make Tone Soup. Now GO TO SLEEP.

Trains

Ivan's still obsessed with them. I can't tell you how many weekend mornings I've woken at 6 am to find a small boy by my bed asking, "Mommy, will you help me build a train track?" We were particularly proud of this one.

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Wedding

Dad and Andi are married! It was last minute--they started sending text messages on Friday and by Saturday night, 80 people we gathered to celebrate. The bride and groom have never looked happier, and I was touched to see all the people who dropped everything and traveled hundreds of miles to share the day with them.

The kids were ecstatic, too. The night before, Annie asked if she could go to sleep and not wake up until the wedding (I told her she was welcome to try). She demanded to wear her tutu, as she does for all special occasions, but she changed her mind after we found her a white tulle dress. Ivan, meanwhile, announced that he was going to wear a "bow tie" to the wedding. I wasn't sure he even knew what that was, but sure enough, he picked out a tie at the store the next day. He refuse to take it off all night, not even to change into his pajamas.




Pretty little buggers, aren't they?

Birthday bonanza

Ivan and Annie are four! The kids begged (and begged, and begged) for a party at a local bouncy-house center. We finally relented, and I have to admit, it was fabulous--by the end, the place was trashed, the 25 kids were exhausted, and Steve and I . . . just walked out the door. Some guy loaded the presents in the car and we were off! HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

Before that, though, we had tons of fun. Here are the kids, lined up and ready to charge.



OMG crazy fun!



My bestie, getting in on the action:



Annie had to be saved from this contraption only five or six times.



Who is that handsome fellow? No, the other one.



So. Many. Children.



After bouncing came pizza . . . .



And more pizza . . . .



And then cake!



Happy birthday, dear babies. Your momma loves you so, so much.

Enough already

Let's just say it's been a terrible week. Ivan has pneumonia and Annie has an ear infection. I would really like for this all to be over so we can all sleep again. Not to mention returning to work.

Sleuthing

I walked into Annie's room the other day to find blue crayon on her dresser, walls and door. I yelled for the kids, pointed to the mess, and began my interrogation:

Me: WHO DID THIS?
Annie: Ivan did it!
Ivan: Mommy did it!

I quickly began to suspect one of them was lying. But who? I followed the crayon trail to the kids' trampoline, where I found this:



That's an "I," "V," and "A" in the same blue crayon. I quickly deduced that Mommy was not, in fact, behind the graffiti. But by then Annie already had most of the mess cleaned up (that little girl LOVES to clean), so my naughty boy got off a little easy.

Sickies

Now I have two sick kids. Ivan's fever hit 103.5 at about 4 a.m. He was upset, but all in all, he's a pretty stoic little guy who doesn't complain much. Compare that to Annie, who has sounded like this, non-stop, for the last three days:

Annie: Mommy!
Me: What?
Annie: I'm sick, Mommy!
Me: I know, I'm really sorry, Annie.
Annie: Mommy!
Me: What?
Annie: My head hurts, and my tummy hurts, and my legs hurt.
Me: That sounds terrible; I am sorry, Annie.
Annie: And my throat hurts. And my heartbeep hurts.
Me: Your "heartbeep"?
Annie [pointing to chest]: Yes, it's in here, and it beeps.

The good news is that they are pretty chipper once I dope them up on Tylenol. Hooray for that, at least.

Oh, hello

Has it been a while? In the interest of time, here is the bullet-point summary of the last four months:

Annie and Ivan Turned THREE!

• They had a bounce house.
• They had presents.
  
• They had two ice cream cakes.
  
• They are constantly begging me for more birthday.
  

Steve got a new job!

• It is down the street from our house.
  
• We are no longer planning a move to LA.
  
• He is very happy.
  

The kids had health issues.

• Ivan was diagnosed with celiac disease, which means we have to eliminate all gluten from his diet.
  
• I discovered that everything in my cupboard contains gluten.
  
• I emptied my cupboard and bought new gluten-free food, plus a bread machine with a gluten-free cycle.
  
• Ivan was maybe undiagnosed with celiac disease, which means we still probably should eliminate gluten from his diet, although no one really knows for sure.
  
• I became very frustrated.
• I consoled myself by looking at my bread machine. I have always wanted a bread machine.

There were more health issues!

• How many ear infections can one kid get, already?
• If it's not an earache, it is a fever. Over the past three days, Average Annie Temperature has been approximately 103 degrees.
  
• I have missed many, many days of work. I hope I do not get fired.
  
• On the other hand, if I do get fired I will have more time to spend with my bread machine.
  
• Maybe illness is not so bad.
  

We went to D.C. to visit the Zimmerpeople!

• Ivan still talks about going to the train with Great Grandpa.
  
• Ivan and Annie loved playing baseball with Grandma, Grandpa, and Aunt Sara.
  
• One day I will try to post the photos. (Don't hold your breath, though.)
  
• We need to take more vacations.
  

Now you are all caught up and we can start fresh!

Bike ride

Annie has been begging for a ride in the bike trailer, and today we finally got a chance to do it. It was one of the coldest days of the year, but lucky for us, still in the 50s and 60s. We took a bike trail to a local playground, where Steve, Ivan and Newton would go by car to meet us.

Annie talked nonstop through the whole bike ride. "Momma! Why are you standing up on the bike? That's not safe! Can I do that too?" "Mommy! Two bikes went past!" "Momma! Momma! Look at the water! Are we going in there?" "Momma! Momma! My head hurts." "Mommy, umm, where's Daddy?" And on and on and on. Eventually we came to this:

Annie: Mommy!
Me: What, Annie?
Annie: Mommy, I am talking to myself. Because I LOOOOOOOVE to talk!
Me: Yes, that is pretty obvious.

Once we got to the park, I took Ivan for a little ride and found myself with the opposite problem:

Me: Ivan? Are you having fun?
Ivan:
Me: Ivan?
Ivan:
Me: Ivan? Ivan are you doing OK? Are you having fun?
Ivan: [whispers] Yes.

Ivan and Annie both wanted to ride home with me. I usually don't go for this, because they have to squish together and end up fighting and screaming the whole way. But today I couldn't bear to disappoint one of them, so after a stern lecture on the consequences of fighting (no more bike rides! EVER!), I labored home with 70 pounds of kid in tow. Miracles of miracles, they didn't have a single spat. Instead, they sang the ABCs, played with their stuffed animals, and reenacted scenes from Dora the Explorer. I wish they had been such good passengers when they were each about 15 pounds lighter.

Mountains

The whole family recently spent a long weekend at a mountain cabin (or cabinet, as Annie and Ivan would say). There wasn't much snow, but the kids were still excited to do a little sledding and build a (very) small snowman.








The next day had even less snow, so we took the kids for a walk by the lake.





There were a few impromptu games of ring-around-the-rosey along the way.



Our cabinet had a beautiful view, and we were treated to some pretty spectacular sunsets.



Minus our one trip to urgent care (Annie had yet another ear infection), it was a wonderful trip. Can't wait for next year.

Train

Ivan adores his trains, and this one, which "goes by hisself," totally rocked his world.

Disneyland

When I was a kid, Disneyland totally rocked my world. My school's annual "Disneyland Day" was preceded by weeks of frothy planning--which rides would we do first? Which treats would we buy? How could we maximize our roller-coaster to time-in-park ratio? When the day finally came, I was giddy with excitement and gleefully spent twelve exhausting hours running up and down and all around the park.

Last week I relived some of that excitement when we took Annie and Ivan on their first trip to Disneyland. I'm pretty sure I was far more pumped about it than they were.

We arrived on a perfect, 70 degree, Southern California morning.



After a rather unfortunate trip to Mr. Toad's Wild Ride (Annie: "TOO FAST! TOO SCARY!"), we hit the flying Dumbos.



Annie, who has great love for other people's mommies, insisted on riding with her Aunt Erin.



Nanny and Paige had their own Dumbo.



Later we took a ride on the Jungle Cruise. Annie was still trying to be adopted into Erin's family, and therefore did not want to take part in our photo.



The kids loved Autotopia. It fulfilled their wildest dreams of fleeing their car seats and taking the wheel.



Annie and Ivan were super excited to see Pooh and Tigger, two characters that they actually recognized (we're not big on Disney, despite my youthful love for Disneyland). Unfortunately, the kids lost their nerve when it was our turn to approach them. After demanding that Daddy hug Pooh bear first, Annie still wouldn't say hello. Ivan, meanwhile, refused to loosen his vice-grip on my shoulder.



We still forced them to pose with Tigger! We are such good parents. This trip to Disneyland was all about reliving my memories, after all.



Here we are waiting for the Toon Town rollercoster. It was much faster than Mr. Toad's Wild Ride! Something I learned: just because the kids say they want to do something doesn't necessarily mean they should!



And finally, here's Ivan in Minnie's house.



It was a very, very good day.

Aspirations

While driving Ivan to the pediatrician last week (in round twenty of Zimmerbabies versus flu season), I realized that he had never been seen by a male doctor. I tried to prepare him for the experience:

Me: Ivan, we're going to see Dr. Smith today. Dr. Smith is a boy. Did you know boys can be doctors when they grow up, too?
Ivan: Uh-huh.
Me: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Ivan: I want to be a daddy.
Me: Why?
Ivan: So I can eat daddy food.
Me: Daddy food?
Ivan: Yes, like chips. I want to be a daddy and eat chips. And I will share with Annie and Ivan.
Me: That sounds like a good plan.
Ivan: And I will sit in the daddy chair.

I later asked Annie what she wanted to be when she grows up; she said she wants to take the train to the big city and work in an office. She's going to take a big bag on the train, just like I do, but hers is going to be filled with toys.

Pretty good plans, I'd say.

Aunts

Ivan and Annie loved playing with their east coast aunties over the holidays, and it seemed like the feeling was a little bit mutual.

Joys of parenting

Having children is both far better, and far worse, than I ever imagined it would be. There are many, many wonderful moments to record, but I though I'd treat you to a taste of parenting's dark side:

Annie (rejecting the eggs I made her): I want a bagel with hummus.
Steve (making bagel): OK, but we don't have hummus.
Me: Do you want cream cheese or peanut butter?
Annie: NO! I WANT HUMMUS!
Me: Annie, we just don't have any. You have to pick something else.
Annie: NO! I WANT HUMMUS!
Me: Annie, we don't have any. That's it.
Annie: I want you to go live in a different house!
Me: Huh?
Annie: I want you to go be someone else's mommy and I want a new mommy!

Sigh.